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The Senate of Rome had been debating among
themselves a certain piece of secrecy for several days,
which caused the matter to be so much the more suspected
and listened after. Whereupon a certain Roman lady,
discreet enough in other things, but yet a woman, laid at
her husband day and night, and mournfully importuned
him what the secret might be. Oaths, you may be sure,
she was ready to make, and to curse herself if ever she
[p. 234]
revealed whatever he should tell; nor was she wanting in
tears, and many moist complaints of her being a woman
so little to be trusted by a husband. The Roman thus
beset, yet willing in some measure to make trial of her
fidelity and convince her of her folly, Thou hast overcome
me, wife, said he, and now I'll tell thee a most dreadful
and prodigious thing. We were advertised by the priests,
that a lark was seen flying in the air, with a golden helmet
upon her head and a spear in one of her claws; now we
are consulting with the augurs or soothsayers about this
portent, whether it be good or bad. But keep it to thyself, for it may be of great concernment for the commonwealth. Having so said, he walked forth toward the
market-place. No sooner was he gone, but his wife
caught hold of the first of her maids that entered the
room, and then striking her breast and tearing her hair,
Woe is me, said she, for my poor husband and dearest country ! What will become of us?—prompting the maid, as
if she were desirous that she should say to her, Why?
What is the matter, mistress? Upon which she presently
unfolded all that her husband had told her; nay, she forgot not the common burden with which all twattle-baskets
conclude their stories; But, hussy, said she, for your life,
be sure you say not a word of this to any soul living. The
wench was no sooner got out of her mistress's sight, but
meeting with one of her fellow-servants that had little to
do, to her she unbosoms herself; she, big with the news,
with no less speed runs away to her sweetheart, who was
come to give her a visit, and without any more to do tells
him all. By this means the story flew about the marketplace before the first deviser of it could get thither. Presently one of his acquaintance meeting him asked, Did ye
come straight from your house? Without stop or stay,
replied the other. And did ye hear nothing? says his
friend. Why? quoth the other, Is there any news? Oh!
[p. 235]
quoth his friend, a lark has been seen flying in the air,
with a golden helmet upon her head and a spear in her
claw, and the Senate is summoned to consult about it.
Upon which the gentleman, smiling: God a mercy, wife,
quoth he, for being so nimble! One would have thought
I might have got into the market-place before a story so
lately told thee; but I see 'twas not to be done. Thereupon meeting with some of the senators, he soon delivered
them out of their pain. However, being resolved to take
a slight revenge of his wife, making haste home, Wife,
said he, thou hast undone me; for it is found out that the
great secret I told thee was first divulged out of my house;
and now must I be banished from my native country for
your wicked gaggling tongue. At first his wife would
have denied the matter, and put it off from her husband
by telling him there were three hundred more besides
himself that heard the thing, and why might not one of
those divulge it as well as he? But he bade her never tell
him of three hundred more, and told her it was an invention of his own framing to try her and to avoid her importunity. Thus this Roman safely and cautiously made the
experiment of his wife's ability to keep a secret; as when
we pour into a cracked and leaky vessel, not wine nor oil,
but water only.
But Fulvius, one of Augustus Caesar's minions and
favorites, once heard the emperor deploring the desolation
of his family, in regard his two grandchildren by his
daughter were both dead, and Postumius, who only remained alive, upon an accusation charged against him was
confined to banishment, so that he was forced to set up his
wife's son to succeed him in the empire, yet upon more
compassionate thoughts, signifying his determination to
recall Postumius from exile. This Fulvius hearing related
the whole to his wife, and she to Livia. Livia sharply
expostulated the matter with Caesar; wherefore, seeing he
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had projected the thing so long before, he did not send for
his daughter's son at first, but exposed her to the hatred
and revenge of him that he had determined to be his successor. The next morning Fulvius coming into Augustus's
presence, and saluting him with Hail, O Caesar! Caesar
retorted upon him, God send thee more wit, Fulvius. He,
presently apprehending the meaning of the repartee, made
haste home again; and calling for his wife, Caesar understands, said he. that I have discovered his secret counsels,
and therefore I am resolved to lay violent hands upon myself. And justly too, said she, thou dost deserve to die,
since having lived so long with me, thou didst not know
the lavishness of my tongue, and how unable I was to
keep a secret. However, suffer me to die first. And with
that, snatching the sword out of her husband's hands, she
slew herself before his face.
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